Gillian Makes Herself

"But if you really want to live, why not try and make yourself?" -Incubus

Other things that make me.

Not much to talk about on the weight loss front, since it’s only been a week, though I am down a pound.  Tomorrow we are starting a new weight loss challenge at work with a fairly decent $$$ prize for only 7 people signed up (so far).

Whether or not I am successful with these things is a completely different topic, but there’s a lot of things I try to do to learn new things and make myself a better person.  It’s not easy for me, but I’m trying.

The first thing has been a couple of books-one I just finished, one I am about to start, and one I want to get.

This is the one I just finished.  It’s a light read, nothing extremely groundbreaking, but plenty of good anecdotes and things to think about.  The ending really got me thinking about the way I react to things day to day.

This is the one I’m just starting, for obvious reasons-I gain weight because I eat to soothe myself and make myself feel good.

I need this book.  Gretchen Rubin’s explanation of how your personality influences the choices you make and how you react to other’s choices is SPOT. ON.  I listen to her podcast, which leads me to my next point…

I looooooove podcasts, especially when I’m driving, running, or doing something like laundry or cleaning my room.





I won’t go into much detail about each one, but I love them because they give me something to think about.  Barbell Shrugged and Pursuing Health give me practical advice about CrossFit and fitness in general.  Freakonomics and This American Life have some fantastic episodes that dive deeper into parts of life that you otherwise may not have picked apart and learned about.  Beautiful/Anonymous and Sincerely, X share stories from anonymous speakers-B/A can be lighthearted or serious depending on the episode; X stories are more serious, but thought-provoking.

Even if none of these are for you, go find a podcast that matches your interests.  To me, they’re better than TV, more convenient than books, and fun to look forward to.

Gretchen Rubin always ends Happier with: “Onward and upward.”

So, here we go.

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Day 1 of tracking on MyFitnessPal.  Thought about Weight Watchers, thought about getting another meal plan done…went with the free option.  You’ll know if I’m not keeping up with it, because I won’t have anything to write about… 😉

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Part [1 of about a thousand] of the problem. 

Let me tell you what I would do in a perfect world:

  • CrossFit at least 3 times a week. 
  • Run at least 2 times a week. 
  • Yoga at least once a week. 

Oh, and if I had the money, I’d throw a few MMA classes in there. 

This is close to impossible. 

But I tell myself, “This is it! This is when I start incorporating yoga to improve my flexibility and add in cardio to improve my CrossFit metcon times…”


I restarted the Couch to 5K app, as you saw in my last post, and I realized something…you only do 3 workouts the first week. I had it in my head that you ran at least 5 or 6 times a week. Don’t ask me where I got that from, since it’s pretty plain to see on the app that there are 3 workouts in Week 1. 

I’ve only been to CrossFit once this week, but I also did C25K twice. That’s not nothing. It’s not perfect. It’s not ideal (in my head), but it’s not nothing. 

One of the worst things that I think happened to me- at this point, 5 or 6 years ago- is that I lost 20 pounds in 2 months. Now, my expectation is that I can do that again, but I probably can’t. I probably shouldn’t. Instead of changing everything at once, I should maybe try those baby steps people talk about. I have to remember that I have more than 2 options, those options being doing EVERYTHING PERFECTLY or absolutely nothing. 

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Couch to 5K…for the 5Kth time. 

And man oh man, my already poor running has gotten worse. Just keeping it real for everybody. 

The problem is, I lose sight of the fact that the most important thing is, I did it. I slept through noon CrossFit. I lounged around all day. Instead of saying, “oh well,” I did something. That’s my biggest hurdle. 

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Correlation does not imply causation…

…but I find I’m more successful with healthy habits when I blog, (insert girl shrugging emoji here).

I’ll lay it all out there.  I’m at 213 lbs, the most I’ve ever weighed, but I look strikingly similar to pictures in 2010/2011 when I was 190-ish.  So there’s some muscle there, but man, I can afford to lose a few pounds.  Here we go again.

I follow (almost) none of the rules.  I eat when I’m bored.  I go to restaurants too much.  I eat after 8 pm.  I don’t drink enough water.  The only rule I follow religiously is I eat breakfast every day, because I would be dead without it.

I need to stop cherry-picking CrossFit workouts and just go.  I have to stop worrying about being the last person coming in from the 400 meter runs and just work out because nobody else cares.

Here we go again.

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Is it too much?

I’ve wondered sometimes if I’m a jack of all trades, master of none. Is it possible to want to do too many things? Is it good to have a lot of different goals? I’m not sure.

  • I’m going back to Branford CrossFit.  In a perfect world, I would have signed back up, like, yesterday.  However, I bought a Zumba Groupon (listen, it’s a workout-I think I burn at least 100 calories just trying to understand what the instructor is doing) and I know I won’t go to Zumba if I have CrossFit AND inShape too.  2 more classes and I will have gotten a deal, so the plan is to go the next two days at least.  And I need to squat tomorrow.  See where I’m going with this?
  • As some have already noticed, I started a Facebook page to start promoting my organizing services.  I know this will never be a full-time job, but I would be happy with 2-4 clients a month and having a little side income.  Once I get a few clients under my belt, I’ll do the whole LLC thing.  I’m a little stuck on how to advertise and promote, but this is also not my #1 priority.  In time, Gill.  In time.
  • I started looking up Group Exercise certifications also.  I probably should be more productive/earn money over the summer.  Too bad everything I’m researching requires some sort of start-up money.
  • It’s only been 2 days back since February vacation, but school feels…comfortable.  As if I actually know what I’m doing.  Then I get nervous.  If it feels easy, then I must be doing something wrong, right?  No?  HELP.
  • I’m all about buying a house within the next year.  If I got an apartment, I’d never be able to save for a down payment.  It’s definitely a long-term goal, but I feel like looking at houses and telling people about my goal will make me more dedicated to it.

I could go on and on.  I have so many things I want to do.  So many things I want to be good at.  Is it too much?  I definitely have the time, so it’s not that I’m concerned with.  I just want to know how to concentrate my energy.  My poor therapist on Thursday…lol.

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Dear diary…

If nothing else, I can use this as my workout log. Today, I decided to try doing a different program. It’ll be easier to do at home if I want, and I was already bored with the full body workout I was doing. Womp womp. 


  • 5×5 back squats 115 lbs
  • 3×8 front squats 65 lbs
  • 3×10 glute bridge with 5 lbs weight
  • 3×10 calf raise

A. I’m weak. It’s so sad. That 265 one rep max is in the past. I need to do a lot to get back there again. 

B. I’ve also been lazy. These weights were actually a bit challenging, but I could maintain good form. So this is where I’m at. 

Also, got a Groupon for a month of Zumba for $23, so there’s the cardio…

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Consistency is Not My Middle Name.

I haven’t written since April.  Oopsies.

I’ve gone through a few phases of working out since spring.  Over the summer, I was CrossFitting at least 3 times a week, sometimes 4 and maybe a couple weeks when I went 5 times.  I loved it.

When school started back up again, I went to CF after the first day, which was just setting up and teacher meetings.  It felt much different, and it was frustrating.

As the school year started, I unfortunately dropped back into the old habit of only going once or twice a week.  No matter how many times I promised myself that I would go, sometimes I wouldn’t go at all.  Between the money, my somewhat consistent shoulder pain, and the fact that I just wasn’t going and doing what I was supposed to do, I decided to take a break.

So, for now, I’ve been trying to follow this.  I’m thinking I’ll probably stick with it for 4-6 weeks and then try to switch it up.  I know I will have lost some strength, but I would like to make up some ground as much as I can.


I would like to be back at Branford CrossFit by June at the latest, if not earlier in the spring.

I am on week 2 of cycle.  I need to step it up on the conditioning, but I’ve been following the lifting days as written.

Right now, the theme here is”Don’t let good be the enemy of great.”

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One more Travel WOD

Descending burpees and ascending sit ups. After the first round, I did half burpees (no chest to ground/push up), because my right arm apparently wants to be useless and cause me pain for any movement. 😑

10 minutes on the elliptical, then the WOD. 

Last night in Miami. So tan. So happy. It’s the little things. 


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Travel WOD: Miami Edition

First full day in Miami, and I figured I should do something after sitting on the beach for 3 and a half hours… 😎 #SorryNotSorry

  • 10 mins walking uphill on the treadmill
  • Air squat/kick workout from Instagram. Lol. 
  • 10-9-8-7-6-5-4-3-2-1 sit ups. Run 100 meters between each set. I couldn’t figure out how to make the dumb treadmill show distance, so I just did 1 minute running at 6 mph. 
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